Nothing Had Changed yet Everything Had Changed with Christina Hess - 7

At the age of eight, Christina Hess took a step that would set her life's course in an unexpected and intense direction. Join us as Christina shares her incredible journey of faith, beginning with her early acceptance of salvation and culminating in her calling into children's ministry. We explore her transition in 2021 to James River Church, where she and her family discovered a deeper spiritual home and sense of fulfillment. Christina's story is not just about personal faith; it's a testament to the power of community, mentorship, and embracing one's divine purpose.

Ever attended a conference with mixed emotions, only to walk away with unexpected revelations? Christina recounts her transformative experience at a faith-based event, where a simple T-shirt with the word "burn" became a symbol of letting go and embracing divine love. From struggling with feelings of unworthiness to understanding the healing power of prayer and mentorship, Christina's journey illustrates the profound impact of spiritual surrender. Her testimony offers insights into how embracing spiritual guidance can lead to personal healing and inspire others on their own faith journeys.

Spiritual growth is not just a personal endeavor; it's a communal one. Our conversation touches on the importance of intentional Bible study and the transformative power of mentorship. Christina shares how engaging deeply with God's Word and surrounding herself with encouraging friends facilitated her spiritual journey, even amid life's challenges. Whether you're seeking a mentor, battling personal struggles, or longing for a deeper connection with God, this episode offers valuable insights and encouragement. Let Christina's story inspire you to seek mentorship, engage with Scripture in a meaningful way, and find strength in community and prayer.

Be sure to visit our website at www.itstimetoriseup.org to learn more about the ministry of Rise Up.

Chapters

• 0:09 Rediscovering Faith and Boldness
• 11:41 Discovering Identity in Faith
• 15:20 Letting Go and Being Loved
• 25:30 Transformation Through Prayer and Mentorship
• 32:59 Deepening Faith Through Mentorship
• 38:42 Finding Encouragement in Spiritual Growth
• 48:27 Engaging With God's Word Deeply

Transcript

Kim McIntire: 0:09

Welcome to the it's Time to Rise Up podcast. I'm Kim McIntyre, your host. Thank you for joining us this week and if you're not familiar with our show, please check out our website at itstimetoriseuporg. There you'll find our social media links and, for our podcast platforms, you'll find us on YouTube, apple Podcasts, spotify and anywhere else you find your podcast. Please leave us a comment, give a thumbs up or, even better, leave a five-star review on Apple Podcasts. We're going to jump right into our interview today. I am so excited, christina, like thank you for your yes. I just want to start with saying I appreciate that you said yes, you're a friend, you're a sister in Christ and I have seen God do an amazing work in you, and today you're here to share about your testimony from Conference 2024. But before we get into that, why don't you just tell our listeners a little bit about yourself?

Christina Hess: 1:08

Okay, well, I'm Christina Hess. I've been married for 20 years to my husband, matt. We live in Pittsburgh, kansas, and we have four kids. So Jocelyn is our oldest, she's 15. Peyton 13. Jillian is 10. And Paxton is 9.

Kim McIntire: 1:31

Wow, so you're a busy mom? Yes, so what is keeping you busy other than kids and husband? Are you doing some ministry work? I know you're doing some ministry work through church. What's that look like?

Christina Hess: 1:43

Yeah, so we go to James River Church over in Joplin, missouri, so that's a 45-minute drive, but it's worth it. A church alive is worth the drive is what we kind of said whenever we first started going. We're like, can we do this commitment? But it's been amazing. And so at church I'm on our prayer team, the discipleship team, and also I serve in GrowTrack and on the hosting team. Matt and I together serve in youth twice a month and so that keeps me busy. During the day I really enjoy different Bible studies. I'm in a life group, I go to a mom's group and my favorite thing to do to fill my time up during the day is go to coffee with women and just talk to them about the Lord and what the Lord's doing in their life and what he's doing in my life.

Kim McIntire: 2:32

Yes, and I'm very fortunate and blessed to be one of those women. Yeah, so yay, and I know you do some mentoring as well.

Christina Hess: 2:39

Yes, yeah, yeah.

Kim McIntire: 2:41

Yeah, okay, we're going to talk about that a little bit later as well. So when did you receive salvation, christina?

Christina Hess: 2:47

So I grew up in church, I would say I received salvation. I was eight is when, you know, I made that decision for myself. But I mean, I grew up in church. I've always been in church, but I was at a VBS at my grandma's church, so not even the church that I went to. When I remember saying, you know, I think, hearing a story about the prodigal son, and like I don't want to be a lost son anymore, and so that's when I accepted Jesus, like for my personal savior.

Kim McIntire: 3:17

I love that at eight years old, I mean, that's been a few years ago, yeah, just a few.

Kim McIntire: 3:22

I won't say your age, but the fact that you remember the Bible story and you remember the lost son. Just that's amazing, because I hear so many people say I accepted Jesus when I was little, but they don't really remember a lot about it, except they remember the prayer you know Right. But yeah, a shout out for VBS. Yeah, what a great ministry. Yeah, that's wonderful. So are there seasons that you look back on your life that you just recognize were spiritual markers?

Christina Hess: 3:51

Yeah. So when I think back over just my walk with the Lord, I mean I know I remember being baptized in water. I remember as a teenager serving in leadership in my youth group and being baptized in the Holy Spirit and that you know, seeking the Holy Spirit and not receiving it right away, but continuing to seek and receiving the Holy Spirit, that's a game changer. Just, different times throughout my life, feeling called into the ministry, there was a time when on a missions trip I've been on several missions trips and where God just broke my heart for the lost but then also called me into children's ministry. So there was a time, at a different church that we were attending, that I was serving on staff as the children's pastor. So those are areas that I can think back to, but probably, you know, the most recently has been about three years ago. So in really the spring of 2021, we just started feeling kind of a holy discontent about where we were at our church. We had been at our church for 17 years. So we were not people that just floated from one church to another. We had been locked in at this church and we were not people that just floated from one church to another. We had been locked in at this church and we were serving in leadership and we had a lot of friends, but God had something else in mind and I would have never gone looking for something else. I was very content and looking back on that season of my life I, probably without realizing it, kind of thought I had arrived as far as like my spiritual journey, like I was doing all the things, I had my kids and I had my husband and I was following Jesus and I was serving in ministry, and so it's kind of like I had arrived. But the Lord wanted to shake things up. He had more for me, and so he started the stirring in my heart for more and where I was just kind of like, why am I not content here anymore? Nothing really wrong was happening and so we just kind of went searching for what God had for us and we found James River and the first Sunday that we attended.

Christina Hess: 6:02

I remember feeling so at home in this big church, much bigger than the church we had been attending. But I felt more at home there than I had felt in the church that I had been in for 17 years and that baffled me. And the church that I was coming from was Spirit-filled, but it was like the presence of the Lord and the Holy Spirit was so thick that it just it was so different. And so it really. And the way the pastors talked about faith and healing and the Holy Spirit I mean I grew up in, you know, the assemblies of God, so I grew up hearing about the Holy Spirit.

Christina Hess: 6:46

But the way Pastor John and Pastor David and Pastor Brandon would talk that summer, as we listened, as they talked about believing God for big things and healing and what the Bible says about healing, like that's when I realized that I thought I had, like hit this kind of glass ceiling in my relationship with the Lord, and the Holy Spirit blew that ceiling up and I realized, oh my goodness, there's so much more that I didn't even realize I was missing out on, and so that really marked my husband and I's life and we started praying for things differently and believing for things differently and seeking the Holy Spirit differently.

Christina Hess: 7:24

And the way we just we became, we had this boldness that was different than it had been before. I remember them saying something about you can be baptized in the Holy Spirit, you can be filled with the Holy Spirit, but if you're not bold, if you're not being bold in your faith, then it's not. It's not really like are you really filled with the Spirit? If you're not, if you don't have that boldness when it says you will receive power, if you're not walking in a bold power, then are you really as full of the Holy Spirit as he wants you to be? And so that was really challenging for me. And so the last three years I feel like I have been challenged and I have grown in my relationship with the Lord more than I even thought was possible. And you know, like we hear all the time like we can go from glory to glory to glory. So I know that even where I'm at now is nowhere near where I can be Right.

Kim McIntire: 8:18

Right, that's so encouraging, so good. Well, we're here to talk about your testimony from the Rise Up Conference in 2024. I was so excited that you went. Who invited you? I don't think I ever asked who invited you. Well, really.

Christina Hess: 8:38

I think that award probably, I think that goes to Chaley Brown, chaley, okay, yeah, you know, I came into the Rise Up conference this year kind of cloaked in disappointment, and the funny thing is that because the year before so in 2023, I had missed out. It was something that by the time, I think, the conference was happening, I was still fairly new to James River. I didn't have a lot of connections with women who were going and it's kind of a word of mouth invitation type thing, and so I missed out and I remembered seeing people going after the fact and I felt like, oh man, I really missed out. So the moment Chaley came home from Rise Up 2023 and she was like, oh, why weren't you there? This was so good. And I'm like, well, I didn't really know about it. She's like mark your calendar. So I put it on my calendar 365 days in advance. I was not going to miss it. But as it got closer to the conference coming, I found myself not really wanting to go.

Christina Hess: 9:38

And I thought, well, this is weird, I've had this on my calendar for over a year and so why am I not feeling excited? I feel like the timing of it. You know things were really busy at home with school starting. I also kind of was. I felt like I had a little bit of a resentful feeling towards my husband that weekend and it's funny. It's not like there was a fight happening or anything major happening, but you know how sometimes when you live with somebody and they're just kind of felt like this, this like fight was like waiting beneath the surface, just something was pressing and I was feeling discontent in that I wasn't really in the oh, I'm so pumped to go hang out with my girlfriends and have dinner and go to a conference sort of mood Like I was just kind of feeling a little glum and I was like what is this?

Kim McIntire: 10:26

And so— Did you identify that as the enemy trying to discourage you, or were you just kind of in that funk of in your mind of just like, eh, I just don't care?

Christina Hess: 10:38

Yeah, no, I knew I was like the Lord has something for me and I know that this is why the enemy is coming against me. So, as much as I kept kind of going like oh I don't know, like is it too late to cancel or no, I need to just go, or what about this this weekend? Or I just, you know, not feeling like this, like my friend kept saying, oh, I'm so pumped to go, and I was like I don't really feel that pumped, like what's wrong with me? But I can definitely identify it as like okay, this is the enemy trying to rob from me what the Lord has for me. And so I just I kind of was just putting one foot in front of the other, knowing that it would be good, but really not being excited in my heart, which kind of surprised me.

Kim McIntire: 11:23

So so when did that shift? Like, did it shift when you're in the car driving to the conference, or did it shift when you walked in the door? Or did you have to go through part of the weekend in that state of mind Like how did that change, or when did that change?

Christina Hess: 11:38

Yeah, so it definitely didn't change. In the car, you know, I still was like having to like put on that face like okay, yay, girls, here we go, this is gonna be awesome. I mean, I was happy to be with these friends of mine. It's not like I was not happy to be there, but I still wasn't, just like you know, exuberant about it. I was still just kind of putting one foot in front of the other.

Christina Hess: 11:59

And then, you know, honestly, as we even walked in the door, you know, I was met by even more disappointment, because I made some decisions just right off the bat that I kind of wasn't I wasn't happy about. And after the fact, like I hadn't really planned to spend extra money, and I walked in the door and within 10 minutes I had bought a book and I had bought a T-shirt and I was kind of like I wasn't planning on spending that money. And now I've already spent this and what am I even doing? Like I bought this book and I am not one that reads books very well or like does Bible study devotionals very well, like I start them and then sometimes I just don't finish them, and so I'm like here I have one more book that I'm probably not going to finish.

Christina Hess: 12:42

And and did I? Why did I even get it? It was, was it out of peer pressure? You know, I just kind of felt everyone else was doing it, so I better get it. And then I got this shirt and you know, it's like if you didn't buy the T-shirt, did you really go? And so it's like. So I got the T-shirt and it had the word burn across the front, which I thought was a little strange. But everybody was getting one. So I bought one anyways, and I love your honesty, christina, you're just totally being honest.

Christina Hess: 13:08

And it's part of the testimony. Otherwise you know, if it didn't matter I wouldn't be going into that much detail, but that word later ended up being a really big part of the conference for me, and so that's how I knew it was the Lord is because I mean, I had that thought what in the world am I even doing buying a t-shirt that says burn on it? That's kind of weird.

Kim McIntire: 13:28

Oh, my word.

Christina Hess: 13:29

But the Lord knew what he was doing.

Kim McIntire: 13:31

I guess he does, he always does.

Christina Hess: 13:34

Yeah, so we even we walked in, we like got our seats kind of like right in the middle, and then this is another little detail you know, god is so in the details but we almost got up and moved to the front row, like over on one side to sit with another friend, and so like we even stood up and we were like getting ready to move.

Christina Hess: 13:53

And then I think maybe music started and we're like no, no, no, we're just going to stay where we are. And so we stayed in our seats and even the worship started and it was kind of one of those things that it was like I don't even really know these songs. It was a little bit rough for me just to enter in, because it wasn't like, oh, this is my favorite song, or oh, this song has had, you know, an emotional impact on me in the past, like they were songs that I wasn't real familiar with. And so, even entering into worship, I found myself really distracted and really having to like okay, lord, how are you going to speak to me? How are you going to have something for me if I can't even focus on you? Like I was so distracted by everything else that was going on.

Kim McIntire: 14:34

Yeah, well, I'm so glad that you didn't leave the way you came. Yeah, share with us your testimony.

Christina Hess: 14:42

Okay, so one of the first speakers was Ashley Wilhite and she was talking about being God's favorite. And the moment she started talking about, like you know, her being God's favorite and are you God's favorite? I immediately was like, well, I definitely am not. So it's a good thing I bought her book out in the foyer because now there's just one more thing for me to put on my list. Like I've got to figure out how to be God's favorite, because everybody else is, but not me. And so again, it still was just almost disappointment, like here's one more thing that I have to do, and um. But then she started talking about, um, lemons and how they a lemon, can't just show up and expect to be lemonade. And in true you know great kids ministry fashion, she had her glass and she had her lemons. And she's talking about like this lemon cannot just show up to the conference and expect to be lemonade. And that's what I was. I was like a lemon that just showed up and I was like, okay, lord, you know, here I am, make me into lemonade. And that can't happen without being pressed and being changed. And I was like that's what I need, like I need to be changed.

Christina Hess: 15:58

And so at the end of her talk, an altar call came for anybody who needed spiritual surgery. And I mean, before the call was even done, I was the first one out of my row and I was down at the front because I was like that's exactly what I need, like the vision of God taking a scalpel and taking his scissors and his knife and like doing some spiritual surgery on me is what I need. Like the vision of God taking a scalpel and taking his scissors and his knife and like doing some spiritual surgery on me is what I needed. Because I had, I just I had all of this kind of disappointment, just like I said, kind of like a cloak hanging over me, and so I'm down at the altar just pouring it out, kind of laying it all at his feet, and I kept hearing the verse over and over again get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, you know, and it goes on, along with brawling and slander and every form of malice, and it just kept repeating in my mind over and over and over again. And I was, you know, being really honest with the Lord and just like I, until this moment, I was gonna say I lived most days pretty angry Like I have some.

Christina Hess: 17:05

At that moment I had wounds that had outlasted forgiveness and that made me angry. I have people in my life that don't always meet my expectations, and I'm one of them. You know there are other people in my life that don't meet up to my expectations, but I'm one of them too and that makes me angry and it's made me bitter, like the lemon that she was talking about, and I know that. You know I sure look bright and sunny yellow on the outside, like a lemon as well, but one bite into me before the Rise Up conference and you would have got a sour pucker, because that's what was inside. And so I was just kind of pouring that all out to the Lord and prophetically, like I heard people praying over me and one of the things I heard was heal her wounds that run deep and that obviously was for me. And then another one was let go, just help her to let go. And I was so encouraged because I was already in the process of letting go and getting rid of this bitterness, rage and anger, like I was already there. But then somebody was praying over me help her to let it go. And I was like, yes, that is for me, and so, you know, I poured my heart out.

Christina Hess: 18:16

I got up from my seat, or got up from, you know, the floor, and I went back to my seat and I felt like, oh man, that right there, that was the whole conference. If the conference would have ended in that moment, it would have been worth it, wow and so. But so I went back to my seat and the next two speakers you know they spoke things that I needed to hear about healing, about freedom and about God's love, and but there was one comment that I really was struggling with, and it was God's love can heal anything, and you'll know you've received that healing when you believe you are his favorite. And I was like, oh, I'm having a hard time with that, because I know that God loves me. I knew that God loved me in that moment, but I did not feel like his favorite. I felt like the people that were the speakers that night they were definitely his favorite, or the team that put on Rise Up, or those women who were praying over me they were definitely His favorite, but I wasn't, and so that's why I was struggling, like, well, yeah, god's love can heal anything, but if I can't even believe that I'm His favorite. How am I going to receive that healing?

Christina Hess: 19:28

And so, after hearing more about restoration and how God has more for us, there was another opportunity for prayer and I didn't really feel like I needed to go down because I already felt like I had had my Jesus moment. I was like I already know, like I'm getting rid of this bitterness and this rage and anger, like I'm laying that down at His feet. So I already had my Jesus moment. But I also, like I had this list of good girl things to do for when I got home, like you sit in a service and you're like, okay, so now I know I need to do this and I need to do this and I need to do this. And it's all about what do I need to do when I get home? How am I going to be better? How am I going to achieve all of this? And so, even though I'd had this moment with the Lord, it was all about me trying to get rid of the bitterness, me getting rid of the anger, and what was I going to do. And so I knew I needed to let that go, and so I actually I decided to.

Christina Hess: 20:29

They called the prayer team forward and it was kind of those moments like if you have, if you need prayer, you know, feel free to come forward. And not, some people were moving forward but it wasn't like a flood of people and I really didn't feel like I needed to go forward because I'd already had my moment. But I saw one of the women on the prayer team up front and she was the one I'd recognized her voice who had prayed for me to let it go, just to let things go. And so I was like you know what? I'm just going to go share with her, like what that meant to me, because she didn't know what was going on with me. And so I went forward and I just I told her I was like, hey, you know, I don't really. You know, I don't know that I really need prayer, but this is when you were praying, let go. This is what it meant for me.

Christina Hess: 21:09

And and I told her that, even as I was saying that I think I was realizing, I didn't believe I really could do it. I knew that I needed to, I knew that I wanted to, but I didn't believe that I actually could. And it's like I'd been in this place before and I'd been in this place before and people like me you know good girls who are good church girls but are exhausted from trying to be good enough, who are exhausted from comparing themselves to others, like we—I couldn't—girls like me couldn't actually be free because, like I, couldn't actually let it go. I couldn't live that way anymore. I could surrender it at this conference, but then when I went home, things were not going to be different and it was just. I was just going to have to wait until the next conference to lay it all down again, because I don't know that I could really keep it at the foot of the cross, I felt like I always kept picking it back up.

Christina Hess: 22:15

So I'm sharing this with her and, in her wisdom, she just began to pray for me and she's praying in the spirit, and I'm praying and I'm overcome with emotion and, before I even realize it, I'm flat on my back, and so I had been slain in the spirit. I'm flat on my back and so I had been slain in the spirit, and the thing when I, when I laid flat on my back, the song that was playing was the father's hands are open wide, and it was like I heard or saw the Lord with his arms out, and it was just like a great big bear hug that he was saying. And in that moment I knew that I was his favorite, because I'd been slain in the spirit before. But it was a time when I was like I've seen this happen and I want this and I'm not leaving until it happens. And so I was seeking after it.

Christina Hess: 23:10

But this night I didn't even go down really for prayer. I went down to share with her what I thought God had already done, and as I was, as she was praying for me, I hadn't thought about it, I hadn't even. It wasn't even on my radar and the Lord was like you don't think you can do this? Well, I'm going to knock you flat on your back and then you're going to spend time in my presence because I'm the one that does it. Christina, you're not the one that has to do it. You don't have to worry about this list of things to do when you get home. You just have to surrender to me and I'm the one who's going to do it.

Christina Hess: 23:46

And the more you spend time, and it's like he had to knock me out so that I would just lay there and just, I just laid there in his arms and I just knew there in his arms and I just knew. It's like he knew what I needed when I didn't even know what I needed. That's right. And so I just laid there in his presence and it was. It was awesome because I, he knew exactly what I needed and it was a deep soaking in his presence, and so I laid there as long as I possibly could and when I finally got up, the weight of the world was not on my shoulders. You know, I came up with a piece that you know is better than understanding.

Christina Hess: 24:23

And then something that was just so cool is that one of the husbands of a woman who's on the Rise Up team came over to me and he said I need you to know that God is working and he's doing a great work in you.

Christina Hess: 24:41

And I just was like you know, receiving that, okay, yeah, that's awesome. And then he said that he had been praying before service and when he got to the seat that I was sitting in, he just felt such a heaviness, and so he just was praying for me and I mean you could have knocked me over with the feather, because that was exactly what I had been feeling was heavy, like through the whole evening. You know, my list of to-dos got longer and longer and I, just I still felt heavy with everything that I knew I needed to do and I knew that even though that heaviness was gone in that moment, I knew that it would come back again. Even though that heaviness was gone in that moment, I knew that it would come back again. But since I was God's favorite now I always had been but since I could like receive it, since I was his favorite, I knew that he would be working to make me into the sweetest of lemonades. Like I wouldn't have to, I wouldn't have to do the work.

Kim McIntire: 25:30

He was working and and Marcus confirmed that when he came over and he said you know, I was praying over your seat and I felt this heaviness and God wants you to know he is working, yes, so one thing I love about that part of your testimony is it shows the fruit that comes from prayer, Because the lead team of course gets there much earlier than everyone else and we intentionally walk through the room praying, laying hands on the seats and praying, because God knows who's going to sit in every seat, he knows who's going to be praying in the altar, and so every square inch is really prayed over. And just to hear that testimony of one of the husbands coming and speaking that word over you, and it just shows that God so honors the prayers that go before conference or worship night and it's really incredible when people actually share that with us. You know that my seat, I know my seat was prayed over.

Christina Hess: 26:35

And I almost moved and I didn't because the Lord had a word for me, like I felt so seen, and so again like well, of course I'm his favorite, so it's so good, Is there more?

Kim McIntire: 26:48

I feel like I kind of jumped in.

Christina Hess: 26:50

Well, you know the kind of the cherry on top of the Rise Up conference for me. So you know that was like Friday night and you know we went home and that was awesome. But then the next morning, you know, we came back and there was a word shared about burning the chaff and I had recorded it. I had presence of mind, like as soon as somebody got up and they said that they had a word. I was like I bet this is good and I recorded it and so I've been listening to it often. But it was about that word burn on the t shirt that I thought was so odd in my first moments in the Keter Center and it became such a special word to me because it was. It was woven throughout every talk, like every single speaker used the word burn at some point and it was in the worship time and the.

Christina Hess: 27:46

The word that was shared is that you know that, like when you know they gather up the wheat and then it has to be beaten in order for the wheat to come off Right, and then that is collected and then the Lord burns off the chaff and it's that yuck, that bitterness, the anger, the rage, the hurt, the disappointment, whatever that is, but it doesn't get. You don't burn it off. He does Right, and it doesn't come off without a beating like but that he's the one that would do it. And so and it's not always been as easy, you know, as I hope like being back from conference and and sometimes feeling like I'm still getting beaten on that threshing floor, you know, like the wheat. But what I keep going back to is that daily there is grain being stored, like the Lord is collecting that grain, and daily he is burning off the chaff.

Christina Hess: 28:49

And I know that years from now I'll be able to look back at the conference and it will be, you know, kind of like a memorial stone where I go okay, this is something that the Lord did in my life, that I came in with all this disappointment and all of this beating and all these things that I was going through. But from it the Lord burned some chaff off and he's still doing it daily, but he's storing up grain and he's burning off chaff and it's not about me doing it. One of the things she said in the word was it's all about surrender and that you have to surrender in order for him. I could not surrender and he wouldn't burn off that chaff. But when I lay down, when I say yes, and when I lay down and I obey and I surrender my hurts, my depression, my disappointment, my anger, all of these battles, when I surrender that to the Lord, then he does the work, he stores up the grain and he burns off the chaff. That's powerful.

Kim McIntire: 29:50

I love that you entered looking at a t-shirt with the word burn, going what? And then you left going what, yeah. And then you left going that's it, yeah, that's good, I mean, god can just do that. So I'm so thankful that that was your experience, that it clicked with you what burn really meant, and so hearts burning for God, allowing God to burn off the chaff and to walk in the fullness of what he has for us. So it's exciting.

Kim McIntire: 30:20

So since conference, what has life looked like? I know that you've started mentoring and pouring into another young woman. So how did you arrive to that decision that you wanted to pour in? And I'm kind of tying this in with it because honestly, christina, because I know you personally, I just feel like what happened at conference was so significant that the Lord, he doesn't want us to stay contained, he doesn't want our vessel to stay contained. So whatever he's pouring in, we are stewards and we are to pour out. And so when you told me that you were going to start meeting with a young woman for mentoring, my heart just did a happy dance because I knew what God had done in part. I mean, this is the first time I've heard you tell the entire testimony, but I knew what God had done in you is something he wants to do in other women, and so just talk about like how did that come to be that you landed on jumping into this mentorship with this young woman?

Christina Hess: 31:28

Yeah, so really, even kind of to back up a little bit in the timeline prior to our DFL, which stands for Design for Life conference in 2023, so October of 2023, so almost a year prior to Rise Up, I had been really struggling with depression and I was in a really dark place. I mean, I love Jesus, but I was really struggling and it was one of the at DFL, there was a moment where he just we were worshiping and that song, I thank God, where it talks about he healed my heart and he changed my name forever free. I'm not the same Like he supernaturally like took that depression away through through a number of things, but time in his spirit, through the speakers, but then also just supernaturally, like he changed my name from depressed to blessed, and I know that can sound a little like cliche, but it was something that like I don't know that I really did anything except for that. I was in his presence and he literally did it. And so at that DFL, he also laid on my heart to seek out a mentor, and so I got home from that conference and started seeking out a mentor and I found a woman at our church who said she would mentor me, and so we started that really at the beginning of 2024.

Christina Hess: 32:59

And through that also, you know, she kind of was like well, what is your Bible time like? What is your time with the Lord look like? And I was like, well, I mean, it's good on some days, but it's strained at best. You know, like I, you know there have been days where it's where there's seasons in my life where I feel like it's really good and then there's seasons where I feel like I'm kind of just going through the motions. And and so she shared with me you know what it would look like, kind of the model that she used for her Bible time and it really sparked something in me like a deeper love for the Word of God. Because instead of just reading something and going on the next day, like you know, I'm a list person and so it's easy for me to be like I'm going to do this reading plan and I'm going to read this certain thing every single day. And I'm not knocking that for people that that works for, but for me I felt like I was just like dipping my toe in the word every day and like dipping it and pulling it back out and then dipping it and pulling back out, and it wasn't being transformational for me. And so then I was getting maybe discouraged, and so then I wasn't as eager to do it again the next day.

Christina Hess: 34:11

And the model that I was taught was it was more like a teabag, steeping in the presence of the Lord and hanging out in a passage of scripture until you had, like, sucked every single thing out of it and kind of every morning like, okay, I'm going to look at this passage with fresh eyes and, lord, what do you have for me? And so seeking out a mentor, and then being challenged to try something different in my Bible time, those things really started transforming my life to the point where I had a really difficult season in my marriage come that spring, and it was a repeat of something that had happened the previous year. The previous year I handled it by just dealing with this difficult thing was I went into my room and shut my door and just like zoned out and watched a movie on my phone. And a year later, because of my yes to the Lord about seeking out a mentor and because of how I was in His Word differently every day, when the same exact thing came my way instead of just running to my room to hide by watching a TV show or a movie. I went to His Word and I went to worship and I handled it so differently and he was so honored through that that it was actually I can look back at that struggle and say that was like one of the sweetest times in my marriage because of how the Lord was working and so, because of those things, I mean, when the Lord does something like that in your life, you're just excited to talk about it.

Christina Hess: 35:52

And so I was given the opportunity to share the devotional at Living Free, which was kind of like a Bible study that met at our church on Wednesday nights. I was asked to share the devotional and I knew exactly what it would be about, and it was about how I was spending my time in the Lord and how iron sharpens iron and how mentorship can really be a blessing in your life and how, if you are not being mentored like you could seek that out. And then also, who could you be mentoring? And so I shared this testimony and a young lady came up to me and I shared it and at the end I was like I would encourage you to do these few things, and one of them was seek out a mentor. And she comes up to me and she goes will you be my mentor? And I was kind of like wow.

Christina Hess: 36:44

I was not expecting that.

Christina Hess: 36:46

I don't know if I'm ready for that right now, and but I said, well, you know what I'm going to pray about that.

Christina Hess: 36:52

But thank you so much, like I was honored that she had listened and heard what I said, and she had questions about kind of the model of how I was spending time with the Lord, and so when she asked me to mentor, I said I'm going to pray about that.

Christina Hess: 37:04

And so, of course, as I'm praying about it, the Lord is like, yes, I mean you challenged her to do that, you encouraged her to do that, and you know how impactful it's been in your life. How can you say no? And so I said, okay, yeah, this is what I think this is going to look like, and I, you know, set up some boundaries, like this is what this is going to look like and this is what I'm available and this is how we're going to do it. And all through listening to the Lord first and asking Him like what do you want this to look like? Because I've not really I've been in other mentorship relationships in the past and I've kind of mentored other girls in the past, but I was in this place where I'm just like Lord, I'm not doing anything if it's not you. And so what does this look like?

Kim McIntire: 37:48

And it looks a little different than it has in the past, and so yeah, it sounds like there's some serious intentionality just with, like, what are we doing and why are we doing it? Right, yeah, yeah, and that probably stems from the changes that have happened in your time with the Lord just through the word and prayer. I love that and I think both you and I would strongly encourage people, and I think both you and I would strongly encourage people if you don't have a mentor, pray, right, yeah, because I think we get sometimes an idea in our mind of, like you know, we see someone who is farther along in the journey than us and we just kind of assume that's the person that I want to mentor me Sometimes that doesn't work out.

Christina Hess: 38:38

I mean, I've been through that before, right? Yeah, well, even I mean to speak to that. When we first started attending James River, we'd left a church where we had been involved and we didn't really know anybody, and it had been some time. But I felt the Lord encouraging me to find a mentor. And I'd reached out to a couple different women and one said yes, but then she was moving like almost right away, and so I was like well, that's not going to work, you know.

Christina Hess: 39:04

And then there was another one, and but then, scheduling wise, like we just couldn't get it to work out. And so, even though I was like, well, lord, you asked me to do this, like my first two attempts were kind of didn't really work out, and so I'd kind of given up and put it on the back burner. And then he said here's another person I want you to talk to. And I said OK, I'll give it a try. You know, kind of half thinking like oh, my goodness, I don't know if I can, what if this one doesn't work out either? But then it didn't, it did work out and it was great. Yes, that's so encouraging, yeah, so don't give up. Don't give up If the first person you ask can't do it, because I mean we're all busy and we all have things that maybe it doesn't work out for them in that season, but that doesn't mean that there isn't somebody somebody else that God has for you.

Kim McIntire: 39:52

Well, I can say just from personal experience, I'm so thankful for the older women that have mentored me and I'm so thankful for the younger women that I have had the pleasure and joy and honor of mentoring, because you get to watch people grow in the Lord, and what could be better than that? I mean it's true discipleship. You know, it's more than just. I mean I love to get together and have a coffee with another sister in Christ, but there is nothing better than really talking about what is God teaching you in the Word Right? What are you hearing from the Lord in prayer? And those conversations are what really like. It's that process of iron, sharpening iron, because you can encourage each other and challenge each other. So I'm so glad that we got to talk about that for a little bit.

Kim McIntire: 40:45

Well, christina, I know that you've battled a lot of things. You've shared many of those things depression, anger, bitterness. Any of those things depression, anger, bitterness. What encouragement would you give to someone who's listening? Because we have lots of listeners Just want to stop here. We don't have lots of subscribers, so please subscribe to our podcast. We get analytics so we know we have lots of listeners. But there's someone listening today or this evening, whenever they happen to turn it on, and they're struggling with one of those things. What encouragement would you give them?

Christina Hess: 41:22

Yeah, well, you know I got to, you know, think about this question ahead of time, and there are several things I feel like that could be encouraging, depending on what season of life you're in, but and so these are in not in order of importance, but just kind of just all of these things. But I think you know one thing like making room on your schedule for things like Rise Up conferences and Design for Life, women's conferences, times where you can get away from the daily grind of your life, and like spend really quality time with the Lord. You know we encourage our kids to go to youth camp and kids camp, and as adult women, we need that too, and so I think that is one thing that, if that's not something that you just budget for and you don't put it on your calendar, I think that's really important. I also think you know mentorship like looking for somebody who is further along in their journey with Jesus, somebody who you admire and you're like this is what I want to be like when I grow up. Find somebody like that and ask them if they can mentor you. And then also you know this sounds so cliche, but being in your word daily, I mean that, of course, that's always the right church answer, but being in the word in a way that it's transformative for you, that you're not just checking the box every day and that you're not doing it out of you, that you're not just checking the box every day and that you're not doing it out of duty, but you're doing it out of desire, because you are really going. Okay, lord, what are you going to speak to me today?

Christina Hess: 43:04

And if you find yourself where you're not in that place, if you're in the place where you're doing it because you feel like you have to, then there's something wrong with the way you're going about it and so maybe seek out somebody like a mentor and say you know, what do you do, or what can I do differently, or what piece am I missing? Because the Word of God is alive and active and it is not going to return void. If you're not experiencing that in your Bible time, then maybe you need to do something different. That in your Bible time, then maybe there's a. You need to do something different. And what I, what I changed in my Bible time, was not like rocket science, but it was. It's what I needed to do in order to experience the power that is the word of God.

Christina Hess: 43:45

Yeah, and, and then another thing, as you were talking about, like you know, hearing about what you know, not just going out to coffee with a friend and talking about you know hearing about what you know, not just going out to coffee with a friend and talking about you know, skincare or our kids, but surrounding yourself with friends that when you talk to them, it's what is the Lord doing in your life, like I, have two friends that we talk daily and we talk about those things like our kids, and you know different. You know talk about those things like our kids and you know different. You know fall traditions, but our conversations are 90% about today.

Christina Hess: 44:19

In my Bible time, this is what the Lord said to me, or when I was praying, this is how the Lord was challenging me, or when I girls, I need you to lift me up in prayer because I'm struggling with this thought and we're able to say that's a lie from the enemy. So, having surrounding yourself with people like that, if you like, if you're feeling isolated, that is not the enemy would love for you to be isolated. That's when bitterness and anger and depression can seek in, and so don't be isolated, but surround yourself with friends that they're also like striving to grow spiritually, friends that they're also like striving to grow spiritually. So, and then even also, you know, more, more encouragement that I would give would be take these things to Jesus, because you know, ultimately, like there was no magical formula that that changed any of these things in my life. It's not like I read, I read a certain book, certain book, or it wasn't even necessarily the speakers at Rise Up or at DFL. It was taking it to Jesus and like being really honest with Him, being completely, you know, vulnerable and surrendering these things before Him and not being afraid that, like if I said you know that I'm angry about this or I'm bitter about this, or I I said you know that I'm angry about this, or I'm bitter about this, or or I'm feeling you know that I'm I felt like I was in the pit of depression, like that wasn't going to scare him away. He wasn't going to be disappointed in me or love me any less if I just laid it out at his feet. But being honest with him and like laying it out because once you, really, if you give it to Jesus, then he can completely change your perspective on that situation that you're in and that's what he did with me and fixing my eyes on him and getting them off of my situation. You know I could have very easily stayed in any of those places and with these things that I was battling.

Christina Hess: 46:11

As long as you look at the waves and like, if you, you know a picture of Jesus walking on the water and he calls Peter out to him. You know, as long as Peter's eyes were on Jesus, he was able to walk on the on top of those waves. But the moment he was looking at the waves, which your waves could be depression, or your wave is, you know your disappointment in your family or your you know the anger that you have, for you know things that happened to you in your childhood. As long as you're focused on those waves of your life, you are going to sink beneath them. But fixing your eyes on Him and surrendering everything to Him, that is what's really going to change it. And so sometimes, you know, I would encourage you to find a verse that maybe it is, you know, fixing my eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of my faith. Maybe that's a verse that you can hold on to or get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger Right after that. It says be kind and compassionate one to another, forgiving each other just as Christ, god, forgave you. So finding a verse that can be your verse, that you can cling to and it may change throughout different seasons of your life, but clinging to a verse and declaring that over your life, that's going to be what's going to really make a huge change.

Christina Hess: 47:32

And then, finally, also just stop believing the lies that the enemy has for you.

Christina Hess: 47:38

He would lie to you and say that you're never going to be able to walk on the water, you're never going to be able to be free of these things, but those are lies from the enemy, and so you can't just stop believing lies, though I feel like sometimes people can feel discouraged when someone's like, well, just stop believing the lies that the enemy tells you.

Christina Hess: 47:59

And I know I've been in a place before where I'm like, yeah, but how do I do that? How do I just I can't just stop believing them. I feel like they're so ingrained in me, or I've made these agreements since I was a child, and so how do you stop believing them? And you have to replace it with truth. So that's where those scriptures come in is what lies are you believing and name them and then find truth in the scripture that combats that, and then that's what you want to start declaring of your life. And when you do that, when you replace the lie with the truth, that's when you're going to be able to stand like, conquer those battles and stand on top of those things.

Kim McIntire: 48:36

You have given such encouragement and direction. You know, for someone who's seeking, and I believe with all my heart there are listeners. They're seeking, they're trying to navigate a difficult situation. Maybe they're not opening the word. I just feel really compelled by the Holy Spirit to share this, and I hadn't planned on it. But if you are struggling to just open the Bible and read, you don't know where to start. You don't know what to do other than just read the chapter and that's not a bad thing, Believe me. If that's what you do, that's awesome.

Kim McIntire: 49:15

But if you want to start connecting your heart to the Word, ask the Lord this question. It's very simple. I'm going to suggest you go to Psalm 23. It's a very familiar psalm. It's very short. It's very powerful. Ask the Lord this question. Just say, Father, what do you want me to know? As I read this psalm today and then read the psalm with that question in your mind, just over and over God, what do you want me to know? And then you know whether you're writing it down or you're just speaking it out loud. Just starting there will change the way you engage with the Word, Because you're not going to close the Bible with this question. Well, what do I take from that, or what did I gain from that? You're going to have a specific, even if it's one thing that you leave the psalm yeah, go ahead, Not just know in your head.

Kim McIntire: 50:23

Right, not just in your mind.

Christina Hess: 50:25

Being a girl who grew up in church my whole life and I never really walked away from the Lord, I know a lot in my head, but that was the connect for me is when I started reading God's Word and going. Lord, what do you want me to know deep down in my heart, Not just in my head, but in my heart?

Kim McIntire: 50:45

Yeah, because there's a big difference. I mean there really is, because I grew up in church and I was in church three times a week my whole life and actually have read the Bible for most of my adult life. For well, I shouldn't say for most of my adult life, but from, like you know, my teens until my early 30s. I was reading for head knowledge, but that shifted for me. Thank you, lord Jesus.

Christina Hess: 51:15

Right, like I can quote Psalm 23, psalm 23. I know it in my head, but if I don't know the Lord is my shepherd, there's nothing that I will have to want because he provides all my needs. If I don't know that deep down in my heart, it's a very different thing.

Kim McIntire: 51:30

Yeah, and so that's my encouragement today for listeners is ask the Lord, what do you want me to know, not just in my with Him, because intellect disconnected from the heart doesn't grow intimacy with Christ, right so. But when you connect the mind and the heart to God's Word, that is when you really you also will grow a spiritual hunger. And I know it's true because it happened for me, it's happened for you and so many women that God's blessed me to be in relationship with. This is their, this is the rhythm of life they're living, and it's it's not because it's just happened, it's it. It requires us to, to ask him to help, right, like, help me, lord, to know what you want me to take from your word today for my heart, and then it flows out of our heart into other people. That's the really beautiful thing is that it becomes a pouring out, and so I'm so grateful that you took your time to be with us, christina. Your testimony is such a blessing, and I would love if we could just pray over our listeners now. Sure, okay, I'll lead that out. Okay, father, god, we thank you that you are a God who transforms your people, that you do not leave us the same God. When we hunger and we thirst for your righteousness, you fill us, and so it is our prayer, christina and I come in agreement, lord, that we're asking for every listener, lord, to have a greater desire to be in your word, lord, to be in prayer, to be connected with other believers who are like-minded in their pursuit of you, in their pursuit of intimacy with you. We praise you, god, that you are not a faraway God. You are Emmanuel, god with us, a personal and up-close Father, and we thank you for the blood of Jesus that allows us to come to your throne boldly, to find grace and help and mercy in our time of need.

Kim McIntire: 53:58

So, god, if there are those struggling with depression, anger, bitterness, malice, rage, lord, we just pray your Holy Spirit would do a mighty work in their heart right now. Just draw them close to you, lord. We pray that your Holy Spirit would meet with them, would guide and counsel and direct them. Lord, thank you for the opportunity to just speak of what you are doing in the lives of your people. We pray that your name is glorified, your name is magnified, because you are worthy of it all. Holy God, we love you, lord, we give you the praise and it is in the holy and mighty name of Jesus. We pray Amen. Thank you again for listening. We are so thankful that you joined us for this episode. Be sure to check us out on Facebook or our website at itstimetoriseuporg. Instagram. At the underscore official underscore rise. Underscore up. We pray. God's grace and peace will be with you In Jesus' mighty name.